Dear Karen,

I just got to realize that most girls have two personalities(if not multiple). By these, I mean their “in the public” personality and their “in private” personality.

Personally, I’m definitely the same either way. In private, I’ll run a mile if I saw a lizard crawling near by and will most definitely publicize it. I’ll still do the same in public. Scatter! 😂

UNLIKE my dearest friend Karen! Karen, I’m still confused 😖. How do you juggle all those personalities with such ease? When it was just me, you and crazy clown Doug in your kitchen, harmless Mr Cockroach passed by and you wasted no time squishing him flat with your mysterious iron slippers. I’m still mourning his death. Would like to send my condolences to his family but they all look the same. Shame.

Uhm, Karen, I don’t mean to sound like a pry but what went wrong whilst it was me, you and thy gentle crush Blue-eyed William? I’ve failed to understand why you jumped a mile when you saw a TINY roach pass by. Was it a different kind of special? Did it have fangs? Was it winking at you, or did you just need an excuse to jump in thy gentle arms of dear crush Blue-eyed William? 🤔

You wanted to impress him? Oh dear! He looked no where near impresses. He looked mortified. In the meantime, Karen, please invest more time in practicing for the Damsel in Distress character. Blue-eyed William won’t like it if you choke him to death in the name of an embrace. I mean, he’ll be too dead to say a word!

With that said, my dear Karen, I pray that the next time I meet you, you’ll be the I-can-punch-your-guts Karen I’m used to. As per now, have a great week.